Psych Eval

in february of 2011, a team of psychiatrists and psychologists evaluated my mental condition with a whole battery of tests, the 20 page result-report of which I just found on my hard drive.
i think it goes without saying that this is an AWESOME read.
one of the many tests was sentence completion. i will copy and paste that section here.
The bit before the "..." is the given statement; the bit after is the response i filled in.


Reisner, Alexandra 2/17/11 Page 15 of 16

I like people who...can relax, don’t pressure me. 

Mom was...my hero. 

When people try to boss me... I get pissed. 

As a child...I was small.

I get angry when...I’m told to do something I was planning to do already.

What worries me... is that life is meaningless. 

The trouble with women... what trouble with women?

Most of all, I want to...matter. 

I am ashamed...of failure. 

They...like me! They really like me! 

A good person...is hard to find. 

The trouble with my home...not enough dogs. 

I dislike people who...are stupid. 

When I was a kid, I liked...reading. 

I can’t stand it when...people on the sidewalk stop suddenly. 

I am afraid...of being alone. 

Compared to women, men...rarely apply logic. 

I used to wish...to be president. 

If I do something wrong...I cover for it quickly. 

I am...adorable! 

A good friend...remembers birthdays. 

The important fact about my dad...is that he’s way smarter than anyone will ever be. 

I don’t like people who... judge me. 

When I was young, my greatest trouble....was w/ authority. 

I might lose self-control...on the dance floor! 

If only....I was rich. 

Marriage is a gamble...b/c you can’t trust anybody. 

I need...affection. 

It is wrong...to snitch. 

God is...dog spelled backward. 

If people praise me...I tell them I agree, but then lose respect for them.

A sister...can be helpful? 

If someone says, “You can’t do it”...I do. 

When I went to school...I had to walk 15 miles in the snow. 

I could kill someone if...I had a gun. 

I feel tense when...I have no control. 

The worst thing a man could do to a woman... is lie. 

The most important thing in my life was...hasn’t happened yet. 

You get punished for...[-] 

Death..., the sweetest mercy. 

When people trust me...I buckle under the pressure. 

A brother...[-] 

When I am criticized...I get pissed. 

My favorite game as a child was...I mostly read books. 

I hate...citrus fruit. 

I can’t think right...when it’s too hot.

Love...lifts us up where we belong. 

I should like...country music, but I don’t. 

I wish I had not... N/A. 

Life...is cyclical.

I guarantee my evaluators did not get half those jokes or song quotes. 

Also, my IQ score is 140 so eat my pussy motherfuckers!!